Legend has it that comedian Chico Marx (above with his brother Groucho in the “South Carolina” scene from The Marx Brothers GO WEST) was backstage after a live performance, kissing on a showgirl smoochie smooo — as was his wont, ladies and gentlemen. But on this particular evening, his wife Miriam had come to see the show and saw this.
“What are you doing?” asked Mrs. Marx.
“What?” said Chico.
“Kissing that woman!”
“Oh, I wasn’t kissing her,” explained Chico. “I was just whispering in her mouth.”
Smooth smoocher, eh?
On the other hand I’ve heard, “sometimes a conversation needs a kiss just to shut up a minute.”
Many have tried it and gotten away with it. Artisanal conversation, it’s called in certain hipster clubs. Then again, as my friend Flash Rosenberg defines artisanal: “Art is anal.”
How about trying this one: “Words can be weapons and comedy our kiss!”
And speaking of contact comedy, check out Flash Rosenberg’s cover for a new cartoon book by John Towsen, Ph.D, “How Many Surrealists Does It Take to Screw in a Lightbulb? or, Why did the Intellectual Cross the Road and Walk into a Bar?